Just a little venting.


I feel inspired. I feel moved. I’ve been dormant for such a long time that my soul is covered in spider webs and my bones are stiff at the joints. I feel deviated from what I knew and I’m embracing what I have yet to learn.
You’ve brought a new sensation that has yet to be discovered and tagged with a label. To say that I’m happy is an understatement. There are no words…
I wake up every single morning, I stretch and yawn the last bits of sleep that still lingers inside me. Rub my eyes and stare at myself in the mirror… with my messy ponytail falling to the side and my shirt wrinkled from the night, I look at myself and I see the person I’d love to be forever. With a half smile, I move past the mirror and I start my day and my first thoughts are always of you.
I didn’t think I would ever be able to start again, but with you, I’ve found my happy ending. I never thought I’d be genuinely happy, but I find myself smiling at stupid love songs and admiring people holding hands and kissing noses. I honestly didn’t think I’d find someone who’d change my entire concept on life because at one point there was nothing to live for, but I look at you and I see my purpose and I look at you and I feel like you’re made of gold.
I touch you and you’re perfect like marble. I kiss you and it’s like our lips are holding hands. I see you looking at me through you lashes and I get goosebumps. You make me want to rearrange history so it would only be you and I for all of time.
I miss you. I miss your smile, I miss you freckles, I miss your smell. I miss the way you bite me and I miss the way I’d get furious at you because you bit too hard. You’re not gone. You’re still here with me. But the thought of you being absent sends me in a daze where I feel like i’m empty.
You will never know the chemical reactions that rush through my veins when I hear your voice. You could never understand and I’ve accepted that I will never have a way to show you. You won’t feel the way I feel, but I’ll live all of my days to try and show you. I can write, I can sing, draw, scribble, doodle every second of every day to try to conjure up an image, a scene, a picture on what goes inside the ventricles of my heart.
I see things differently. Colors are more vibrant. Sounds are more sharp. Food tastes bolder. The sun feels just a little bit warmer and so does winter, I know that I’ll always have you be my cover.
Twenty-one. That’s how old we are. That’s how long it took us to cross paths. Twenty-one years and one man is all it took to bring my life up from the ashes. I will never be able to thank you or even repay you for all the things that you’ve done. Your kind gestures, you’re surprises, your gifts, the endless warmth you supply to me, the countless kisses on my cheek. I may not have much, I may not be much, but I swear I’d take the weight of the universe for you and I’d take all the pressure and I promise I could be your diamond. You are my greatest tribute. You are the only legacy I’d want to leave my mark on. You are the greatest thing I’ve ever called mine. You are every fragment of hope. Every sliver of light. The greatest piece of me. Every piece of you. Every possible piece of us.
There is nothing grander than my weakness for you. Nothing stronger than my affection. I’ll infinitely adore you, admire you, love you. I’d cross any ocean for you and with that being said, I cross my heart. You’re perfect in my eyes and I swear you could do no wrong. You’re flawless and pure but you have stolen my heart..andI wouldn’t have it any other way. Please hold it, keep it, and store it away. I’ve got plans for you and I. Let me show you what love is through my eyes and I vow to you, we can be immaculate.

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